I'm Putting Out An Ad ...

Wanted:

Housewife

Qualified candidate will fulfill the following duties:

House cleaning (kitchen, dishes, bathrooms, vacuuming, dusting, cat litter, make beds, etc.), wash and fold laundry, prepare breakfast every morning, prepare a healthy yet delicious dinner every night for picky family of five, make/pack lunches.

Grocery shop.

Carpool ...

Drive the morning elementary carpool, drive preschoolers to and from school, drive children to and

from various extra curricular activities such as ballet, art, church group, swimming and playdates.

Volunteer at the elementary school.

Homework ...

There is A LOT and currently only one of three kids has it - be prepared for the load to triple soon. 

Help children master spelling, finish math homework, practice reading, do flashcards and study for tests. 

Oh and please don't forget the school projects!

Pay bills, organize/manage household financial affairs, schedule appointments, actually make it to said appointments on time in between other scheduled activities.

All duties to be performed on a daily basis in a timely manner- no room for slacking!  Expect frequent interruptions from children, husbands and friends .... and always leave time to quickly regroup from error.

Most of all make life easy for the real Housewife/Mommy

so she can relax and enjoy her husband and children.

One more thing ... there is no pay.  Bonus: If you can fit your own personal interests into random five minute incriments throughout the day, your set!

Can anyone relate?!